Claremont
You could usually count on both from the Rev. Stanley Piwowar whether you were his friend for years, a new acquaintance or somewhere in between.
Father Stan, as he was known by everyone, served as pastor of St. Joseph Catholic Church on Elm Street in Claremont for 43 years, and after retirement, he kept a full schedule ministering to many, always ready with a blessing and Tootsie Rolls.
His numerous works, both physical and spiritual, were a reflection of his daily commitment to his vows of serving God by serving his church and his community.
“To him, everyone was a child of God,” said Father Stan’s nephew John Blicharz, a deacon in the church in Bellows Falls. “He was a priest who dedicated his life to the community. Everywhere he went, he did his best to serve the people.”
Piwowar, who died March 20, 2018, at 92, found himself a home in Claremont when he arrived in 1965, and he never wanted to leave.
“He fell in love with the Claremont community,” Blicharz said. “He was great for Claremont and Claremont was great for him. People appreciated his blessing and Tootsie Rolls.”
Arline Marro, a longtime St. Joseph’s parishioner and childhood friend, said, “He knew how to reach out to people and he was always considerate of people. And he was good to the kids and they loved him.”
Father Stan packed a lot of energy and optimism into his small frame. A tireless worker, he enjoyed physical labor. With a kind and generous nature and a genuine interest in the well-being of whomever he met, he left a lasting impact.
“He was a true priest. There was not a phony bone in that guy’s body,” said Ron Gilbert, a close friend and St. Joseph’s parishioner. “Kids, who today are 30, 40 years old, they were crying when they went by the casket (at the wake). He really left an impression on everybody.”
Marilyn Gilbert, Ron’s wife, has a memory of Father Stan standing in the middle of the church not long after arriving and quietly gazing around.
“When he walked into the church the first time, it was a mess,” recalled Gilbert. “It was not painted. It was falling apart. He walked in and he knew right away and he said, ‘This is my church.’ ”
He not only inherited a church in disrepair but a parish in dire financial straits.
“We had about $35 left in the bank,” Marilyn Gilbert said.
But through hard work and a frugal financial approach, Father Stan slowly put the parish on sound financial footing.
According to a history of the church compiled in 2000, by the mid-1970s, he had successfully paid off a $35,000 debt including $15,000 in interest.
Father Stan’s service went far beyond the walls of St. Joseph’s, which was built by Polish immigrants in 1925.
He was on local boards, including the senior center and Valley Regional Hospital, was chaplain for the Claremont Fire Department for 38 years and worked with Alcoholics Anonymous and AARP.
“We had AA at our church and he went to the meetings and I’m sure he helped many of them,” said Marro. “He was just so understanding and forgiving. Nobody, in his mind, was below him.”
That philosophy was ingrained in him by an older priest he knew when he was in Franklin, N.H., the Gilberts said.
“His advice to Father Stan was, ‘You’re not above anybody. You are there for the people.’ He always remembered that and he lived it. He was very humble,” said Ron Gilbert. “He was totally respected by everyone.”
Besides shoring up church’s finances, he grew the congregation and completed more than $1 million worth of improvements including adding an elevator and air conditioning.
He funded those projects with proceeds from the annual lawn party and turkey party as well as the weekly collection.
“Never once did he ask for money. People would just give it,” Ron Gilbert said.
The son of Polish immigrants who owned a grocery store, Father Stan grew up in North Walpole, N.H., and graduated from Bellows Falls High School.
He attended St. Mary College in Michigan followed by seminary school in Baltimore and came to St. Joseph’s after serving parishes in four New Hampshire communities, including in Manchester.
At St. Joseph’s, Father Stan didn’t have a hired assistant to help him run the parish, but he didn’t need one as parishioners eagerly stepped forward to help wherever and whenever needed when they saw how hard he worked.
“He was almost a one-man gang,” said his friend Poody Walsh of Claremont, who remembers trips to Saratoga Springs, N.Y., with Father Stan to watch horse racing.
Marro said Father Stan set an example when it came to getting things done and that is why people wanted to help him.
“He wouldn’t say to somebody, you do this and you do that. He got right in there and was in the midst of everything. He did so much for the parish and built it up so well,” Marro said.
Father Stan started the annual St. Joseph’s lawn party that for years was held every August on the grassy area next to the church.
“He made all the arrangement for all the rides,” Marro said. “He did so much himself. Everybody was glad to work for him.”
When the party started, Father Stan was out there in his work clothes helping.
Father Stan also did a lot of the church maintenance including cutting the grass, painting and shoveling and salting the walkways in winter.
“He used to seal the whole driveway, by himself,” said Ron Gilbert. “He’d wait for a hot summer day, put on his pith helmet and have his five gallon cans out there sealing the driveway.”
Throughout his time at St. Joseph, Father Stan earned a reputation for being extremely generous.
He donated to the Stevens Alumni Association, the hospital and senior center to name just a few organizations and quietly, anonymously if he could, gave many smaller amounts to individuals.
He also paid the tuition of any student from St. Joseph’s who attended St. Mary Catholic School.
“Anybody that needed help, he’d give them some money,” said Ron Gilbert. “I never saw a person so generous in my life.”
Erica Sweester, a waitress at the Pleasant Street Restaurant, was just one of the recipients of that generosity.
Sweester said in 2014, she was going through a difficult period with a young daughter and to make matters worse nearly all of her possessions were stolen from her apartment.
“I lost everything and was having trouble paying my bills,” Sweester said.
It was around the holidays that year when, Father Stan, a regular at the Pleasant Street Restaurant where he knew the family that owns it, stopped in for lunch and was served by Sweester.
Shortly after Father Stan’s death, Sweester told the story of what happened next in a Facebook post.
“Father Stan had gone into the kitchen to say goodbye and asked my boss if she had a waitress going through a hard time that could use some help,” Sweester wrote. “There was an envelope with enough money in it to pay for several electric bills. About a month later, there was another one.”
On the envelope’s outside was a blessing that said in part, “May the Christ Child hold you in his loving arms this Christmas season, Santa.”
“I was not supposed to know it was from Father Stan so I couldn’t thank him,” said Sweester. “It taught me to give. I keep the envelope, stained and ripped, to remind me just to give.”
Todd and Pam Johnson, who own the restaurant, said Father Stan would make a point to come into the kitchen and give a blessing to the staff every time he came to eat.
“We are not Catholic, but he made us feel that didn’t matter,” said Pam.
“He was just one of the nicest guys you could ever meet,” added Todd. “Everybody seemed to know him and like him.”
For years every October, Father Stan would buy a few thousand dollars’ worth of restaurant gift certificates and tell the Johnsons to hand them out randomly at Christmas.
The Tootsie Roll tradition began years ago, and Father Stan chose that candy after consulting with dentists who told him it has lower sugar content than most candy so it is less harmful to the teeth, Marro said.
In a 2001 newspaper article celebrating Father Stan’s 50th anniversary in the priesthood, the Rev. David B. McIlhiney of Trinity Episcopal Church at the time said he learned from one of Father Stan’s parishioners that he handed about 6,000 of the candies each week.
Father Stan was never known to take a true vacation, but every August he penciled in a trip to Saratoga Springs to watch the horses and place a wager or two.
“He really enjoyed it and he was good at it,” said Walsh, a sports correspondent in the Claremont area for the Valley News.
“He was a kind-hearted and wonderful man. We all miss him.”
As his health continued to deteriorate, Father Stan moved to a retirement home for priests in Manchester, who Elaine Pelchat was his nurse.
“We became fast friends,” Pelchat said. “He gave me my daily blessing and my husband his and even our two dogs.”
When Father Stan retired in 2008 for health reasons, he lived in a small apartment attached to the Gilberts’ home on Winter Street for nine years before moving to Manchester the final year of his life.
Though retired from running a parish, he nevertheless kept a busy schedule ministering.
“While he was here, we’d see strange cars in the yard; he was counseling people,” Ron said, adding that he baptized a baby and married a couple in the apartment” where he had set up an altar and said daily Mass.
“I would go into to see him every morning and ask ‘How you doing, Father?’ And he always replied, ‘Can’t complain.’ He still went to visit the hospital and nursing home and kept up the Junior Catholic Daughters,” Marilyn said.
“He lived the priesthood. He really did,” said Ron. “He was the people’s priest.”
Patrick O’Grady can be reached at pogclmt@gmail.com
